Published 14/11/2011 | 05:00
•I am writing to you to welcome the appointment of Kevin Cardiff to the European Court of Auditors. I welcome it for the following three reasons. Firstly, Mr Cardiff's department has a history of losing Irish debt. If he could bring this skill to Europe it could prove to be an expedient method of cancelling some of the national debt.
Secondly, if Mr Cardiff doesn't go to Europe he has to stay here. "God speed, Mr Cardiff," I say.
Thirdly, Mr Cardiff's promotion would leave a vacancy for which I could apply. A good government should use the lessons of the past to solve the problems of the present.