Ugliness of Kate Moss's mile-high meltdown
Kate Moss's in-flight behaviour, says Sarah Caden, showed the point at which a loveable brat becomes a 'basic bitch'
Published 14/06/2015 | 02:30
A 'basic bitch'. That, apparently, is what Kate Moss called an easyJet pilot last week as she - Moss, mind, not the easyJet employee - was escorted by police from a flight from Turkey to London.
A basic bitch, in case you're wondering, is a workaday Joe Soap without class or status, who gets their hands on the latest trends once they trickle down to the Penneys price range and who is, well, a nobody. Which is to say, not like Kate Moss.
But then, what is Kate Moss? Supermodel or former supermodel? Party girl, or more accurately, party woman who's wearing every year of her fun times on her increasingly mopey-expressioned face? Free-spirited hellraiser or 41-year-old hanging on desperately to that which she should have left behind by now? Which, in the case of last week's antics, included swigging vodka from a bottle hidden in her handbag, one fellow passenger reported, and throwing a hissy fit over the lack of in-flight catering. Now that's what you might call basic.
Before we go too far in turning the basic back on the badly-behaved Moss, though, let's extend her a little understanding. She was flying home from a week in Bodrum, Turkey, which was a holiday to celebrate the 50th birthday of her long-time friend and one-time neighbour in London's Primrose Hill, Sadie Frost.
It had been a clean-living, detoxing week, apparently, and pictures posted online showed the group of assembled friends sunbathing, taking a boat trip, and, in Moss's case, posing in her pyjamas as she made her way to a dressed-down breakfast. No partying.
Given the world we live in, of constant camera-shutter-snapping and scrutiny, there are, of course, pictures available of Kate Moss at the airport before her flight. There's Kate heading for the check-in desk. Hell, there's even Kate smiling and being friendly to some airline staff. They're hazy snaps, out-of-focus snaps, hardly worthy of being called photos at all, and, apparently, they're what started Kate's bad mood.
It's called 'red-rope rage', and it's what happens when famous people get too large a dose of the basic people, who should be kept outside of the red rope at glitzy events. The rage occurs when ordinary sorts spot a famous person out and about, take pictures of them as if that person can't see that they're being gawped at, and talk about them loudly as if they can't hear them.
And not saying nice stuff, but more like, "Oooh, she's not as good-looking as she is on the red carpet, is she? They must do a lot of work on her photos". Yes, it sounds irritating, but apparently it puts Moss into the rage.
She was peeved, reportedly, when people started photographing her luggage. Really? It's hard to know who's being more daft in that situation.
On the easyJet flight, they had no sandwiches for Kate and her friend. And maybe they weren't too free with the booze, either, if we're to believe that Moss was swigging spirits from her handbag. A posh bag, obviously, but still. When she then spotted the cabin crew tucking into pasta on their break, it seems, she lost it.
There was, reportedly, "effing and blinding", and Moss made loud comments about how it was all very well for them to get fed, when no one else could. From there, it escalated into hard words, worse language, threatening behaviour and, ultimately, the arrival of the police at the plane in London.
You can imagine, let's be honest, that even those who weren't bored enough with their own lives to take photos of some suitcases found the whole thing pretty entertaining. Admit it, you'd have dined out on it for months, too. Oh, that Kate Moss, will she ever learn?
It must be difficult, relatively speaking, to be lambasted for that for which you were once loved. There was a time, probably back in her 20s, when she was involved with Johnny Depp and at the height of her supermodel fame, when Moss's party-loving was celebrated. She was the Croydon girl made good, who was spotted at the age of 14 and made it all the way to the top, despite being officially too short to be a model. She always seemed to be laughing, always up for a good time, living hard and loving hard and making a fortune.
Essentially, Moss was living out a twentysomething fantasy of fame and fortune and she was celebrated for it. And she got away with it through her 30s, too, when she was part of a fun-loving, beautiful and blessed London set, including Frost and her then husband Jude Law. In some ways, we perceived Moss as someone who was getting away with it. She wasn't the most perfectly beautiful or perfectly behaved person in the world, and we had a sneaking admiration for how she managed to buck the expectation that you hit your 30s and you grow up and you knuckle down and you turn into your parents. She was a rebel on behalf of us all to some extent, and she has always been a refreshingly flawed antidote to the mystifyingly inane likes of Kim Kardashian, with her balloon bottom and 'Kevin the Teenager' husband.
But there's a point at which it's not fun to watch someone else being boozy and bolshie and bold.
Perhaps aware of this, or, possibly, sick of being judged for it, Kate took herself out of London's Primrose Hill several years ago and now lives on a farm in the Cotswolds. She's married, to The Kills musician Jamie Hince and she has a 12-year-old daughter, Lila Grace, whose privacy she has always guarded carefully and without fuss.
The move to the country meant that she is now only rarely photographed a bit wobbly on her feet leaving a club, but every time that happens, the commentary generally runs that she's looking less than perfect and that the decades of enjoying a drink and a fag are showing on her face.
"Sources" close to Moss disclosed last week that it's this kind of commentary, and not so much the being caught being naughty, that really bugs her. She's OK with being perceived as a bold girl, but not as a badly ageing prima donna, apparently. So, at her country refuge, Kate is known as a fantastic hostess, who makes legendarily delicious family friendly Sunday lunches; but also knows how to throw a wild and decadent party, just like old times.
This begs the question, however, that if Moss is wise enough to know that she can't whoop it up publicly like she used to without all manner of unflattering comment, then what was she doing getting half-cut on an easyJet flight?
In fact, what was she doing on an easyJet flight at all, where, without doubt, the irritating hoi polloi couldn't stop themselves taking photos of her, her bags, her behaviour? If she wants to talk basic, then flying budget is about as basic as it gets. While flying budget but expecting multimillionaire treatment is just asking for trouble.
There's being basic, and then there's just being a bitch. And on the flight from Bodrum, maybe Kate Moss became both.