Mile-high club, anyone?
The Stone Roses may be reforming
Wednesday March 18 2009
They have been accused of not providing a decent service, but it seems that some of Ryanair's staff have more strings to their bow than meets the eye -- just ask trolley dolly Edita Schindlerova.
When not shaking down the passengers she has an interesting nixer -- she's a porn star.
Interestingly, Ryanair has no issue with her sideline, saying: "What people do before or after they work for us is their business."
But the news has caused major problems for Edita -- her porn colleagues are now shunning her.
Said one of the actors: "Look, we all have standards, and frankly I think it's disgusting that she works for Ryanair. All of us here at Biggus Dickus Productions feel really let down by her. If only she had told us she worked for them, maybe we could have done something to help her. Now, she has lost all our trust. Now, if you don't mind, I'm off to do a three way."
A tale of two countries
Okay class, let's play a game of spot the difference.
In London, our beloved Finance Minister Brian Lenihan did his best Chicken Licken performance to the international media on Monday by insisting that our recession is the worst in the world and that Ireland is, basically, screwed.
Lenihan's appropriation of the Carslberg ad: "Ireland: probably the biggest recession in the world" immediately sent the media into a tizzy. Presumably, he then finished his speech by asking the assembled hacks to have a whip around for him so he could get the bus home.
In Washington, Ben Bernanke, who as head of the Federal Reserve holds one of the highest posts in America, came out this week to say that America could begin to stop their recession within nine months, saying: "We're working on it and I do think we'll get it stabilised by the end of the year . . .
"We'll see recovery beginning next year and it will pick up steam over time."
Honestly, those Yanks and their optimism and can-do spirit, it's enough to make a depressed Finance Minister sick.
Inspirational journalism . . .
The BBC is obviously a shadow of its former self, but it really excelled itself with its interview with Binyam Mohammed, the Ethiopian asylum seeker who was recently released from Gitmo.
The Beeb bagged an exclusive interview with the man -- on condition they didn't ask about why he went to Afghanistan in the first place and why he was arrested leaving the country on a false passport. So, the two things people want to know, and they agree to ignore them and allow Mohammed to spin his tales unchallenged.
Cracking stuff, lads.
iSpied
LOST CLASSICS
One of the most claustrophobic and genuinely eerie abduction movies of the last few years, Alien Abduction: The McPherson Tapes, purports to be the newly discovered video tapes of a missing family's Thanksgiving celebrations.
When two of them inadvertently discover some creatures dissecting some of their cattle -- as you do -- the family is subjected to a night of confused terror as they struggle to accept what they're seeing.
Originally aired on UPN as a documentary, the shaky, hand-held camera adds to the tension and the stilted dialogue gives it a real air of authenticity and, at the very end, we see more 'real' footage of what happened to them.
Think it sounds familiar to The Blair Witch?
It is -- it also happens to have been made two years before Blair.
LOGGING ON . . .
Get your flares and psychedelic hoodie out of the closet -- the Stone Roses might be reforming. The band were a notoriously shambolic live outfit -- although standing at the side of the stage during their Feile gig in Cork remains a treasured memory -- but they're the Stone Roses. Of course we want them to reform.
HMV is running a competition on the band and a poll on whether they should get back together.
Check out getcloser.com and bag yourself some goodies.
