It's simply not acceptable that rape victims have been sacrificed to save a paltry €20,000
As part of the most recent round of efficiencies in the health service, rapists have agreed to rape for just 11 months of the year. The surprise arrangement came to light on Monday when it was revealed that rapists in the midwest would be taking one month off later this year.
Cognisant of the strain on the public finances, and the consequent need for the Government to continually gouge money from services for the most vulnerable, rapists will refrain from raping anyone in Tipperary, Clare and Limerick in September.
By decree of some bureaucratic pen pusher, there will be no sexual violence, of any description, in the region for approximately 31 days.