Behold the foolproof diet - involving one exercise that you do sitting down
There will be a glut of diets in the next week or so. The usual pictures will appear in all the papers of a man, or most probably a woman, wearing his or her pulled-out old elasticated trousers.
The caption might read 'Mary Slim lost 7 stone by eating our beetroot diet'.
People are gone mad for beetroot. Time was when the cattle wouldn't eat it. The beetroot-stained teeth and lips also provide a handy excuse for those of you who are too fond of the red wine.