Tuesday 6 December 2016

We should protect vulnerable tweens against 'Bieber Fever'

As kids the world over succumb to delirium, Eilis O'Hanlon wishes we would just let children be children

Published 13/03/2011 | 05:00

And they called it puppy love. Oh, I guess we'll never know... I certainly don't. Probably never will. In fact, I don't think I've been more insulted in my life than when the man in the office said: "You have young children, don't you? Your house must be awash with Bieber fever right now."

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No offence to the Canadian pop sensation, who brought Dublin to a screaming standstill last week, but if my children were to regard The Bieber with anything other than scorn and derision, I'd consider myself a total failure as a parent, as a mentor -- heck, as a human being -- and put them up for adoption immediately.

Jedmania, I get completely. Jedward are as mad as the proverbial box of frogs, but it's hard not to take a liking to them. They're sui generis. They're funny. They're... Jedward. If they had eight million followers on Twitter, and their videos had been viewed more than a billion times on YouTube, I'd say fair play to them. And mean it. But if John and Edward Grimes are a hearty feast of fun, then Justin Bieber, by comparison, is a service station sandwich, made of rubbery, processed cheese, limp lettuce, and rancid margarine. It satisfies some temporary peckishness, but it's only going to make you feel sick later.

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