Lise Hand: Not a bacon butty in sight -- just egg on Enda's face
The Opposition leaders may have been getting a breakfast-time briefing from Enda on who said what to whom in Brussels last week, but the austerity cuts have even seeped in under the door of the Taoiseach's office, it seems.
In keeping with the season, the fare on offer resembled the Paddy Kavanagh poem in which he described an "Advent-darkened room" with its "dry black bread and sugarless tea".
"No breakfast, just tea and coffee," revealed one gutted Opposition party spokesman. No bacon butties or posh croissants, or even a bowl of porridge in sight.
But it wasn't just the lack of some gift grub which left Gerry Adams with an air of dissatisfaction when he scurried into Leaders' Questions in the Dail in the nick of time.
Nor was Gerry the only tardy soul into the chamber. Enda began Leaders' Questions on his lonesome on the front bench, until Simon Coveney barrelled through the door and slid in beside him.
Nor was there a single soul on the Labour benches for the first 10 minutes of the first Dail session of the last week of the term.
But the Opposition was fretting about the fallout from last week's Brussels imbroglio, and about whether Enda should have thrown a few more warlike shapes in defence of Ireland's interests, a la David Cameron.
Gerry Adams wasn't a coinin sasta at all.
"You shared with us this morning a letter which you wrote to President Van Rompuy, and it was a very fine letter indeed," he said graciously. "And among other things it says during the meeting of the European Council you were going to raise the issue about reducing Ireland's debt," he added.
"This morning at our briefing you told us you didn't do this, you didn't raise it. And I was wondering did you forget? Did you leave the letter behind you? Were you tired? Why didn't you do it?" he demanded.
The Taoiseach wasn't impressed. He had got out the best cups and saucers, invited in the Opposition, but they still weren't happy.
"There was a music outfit Mike and the Mechanics and they used to sing a song called, 'Isn't it Amazing'," he began. (Now, as far as some fast investigative journalism could ascertain, Mike and the Mechanics didn't have a song of that title. However, they did have a big hit with 'All I Need is a Miracle', which may have been a more apposite song for Enda).
"You attended this morning at a private briefing. . . But what you're now saying is not what you were told. It's not a case of me forgetting, it's not a case of me not wanting to say this. It's a case of you deliberately misinterpreting what I said this morning, because I said that I did raise it at the council meeting," he insisted crossly. "If you didn't hear that this morning than either you or your adviser, do not understand plain English, because I thought that I made it very clear," he sniped.
But then Mattie McGrath took the wind right out of Enda's sails. "He must not be paying his adviser enough. He needs a more expensive one," he sniped right back at the Taoiseach.
Enda appeared to have cheered up by the time he tangled with Micheal Martin later in the afternoon, when the Fianna Fail leader demanded time in the schedule to debate the whole sorry EU mess.
The Taoiseach was most obliging.
"I'd be happy to answer questions arising from the debate tomorrow," he replied, "if the Opposition look for extra time, we'll change the rules, come back here next week," he offered cheerfully.
"Stop messing," retorted Micheal, surrounded by a chamber of aghast faces.
"I'm not messing -- I'm quite serious," chirped the Taoiseach.
Enda grinned innocently. "If the clamour starts for a sitting next week, we will be happy to do that," he promised.
By golly, you could hear a pin drop in the place. Silent night wasn't in it.
- Lise Hand
Irish Independent
