Have any of them not actually smoked it?
Friday July 20 2007
What is it with politicians and dope? It doesn't seem so long ago when an admission of past drug indis-cretions would have marked the end of a political career.
However, since Bill Clinton's infamous and rather unfeasible claim that he smoked but didn't inhale, it seems the floodgates have opened for politicians boasting about their drug fuelled past.
In Britain, new Home Secretary Jacqui Smith's admission that she smoked spliffs in her youth means there are now seven cabinet ministers who are open about their previous consumption.
In the kind of statement guaranteed to drive the prohibitionists mad, Smith simply shrugged her shoulders and said that she wasn't proud of it, but wasn't going to lie about it.
Of course, in this day and age, you might be more surprised by a politician admitting that they had never smoked dope, but that's not the attitude of the Daily Mail.
According to one irate Mail reader: "A quick question. If, as seems increasingly evident, cannabis affects the brain, how can we be sure that MPs and ministers, many of whom admit to cannabis use, are mentally fit to govern us? If athletes et al can be tested for drugs, surely we can have the same test for politicians?,Now that would be an interesting task -- although in our own cabinet, we'd be better off testing for any signs of intelligence before we start testing for drugs.
The Harry Potter books may be entertaining -- I'll be one of those saddoes queuing outside Eason's at midnight tonight, "but it's not for me, honest your honour" -- but they are nowhere near as amusing as the reaction of the religious lunatics who think Harry's evil.
Old Sour Kraut himself, Pope Benny, is the most obvious example of a crank who thinks that the books "introduce children to the dangers of neo-paganism", while the American Evangelical movement has ruled that "The problem is, witchcraft is not fantasy; it is a sinful reality in our world.,But, sadly, it seems that some religious types are now trying to co-opt Harry into their own beliefs and the Church Of England is even releasing a book Mixing It Up With Harry Potter which aims to use Potter to spread the Christian message.
God dammit - do the Churches have to ruin everything?
There's nothing guaranteed to make Harry Potter more unattractive to kids than having their local father Trendy going on about how great it is... unless that's their secret plan?
You have to keep an eye on those Church of England types, they're a slippery bunch.
None of us actually likes going to the doctor, and, by the same token, none of us likes having to deal with a doctor who thinks he's better than you
Yup, arrogant medical officials are truly a bane of society, but even the most arrogant quack would have to doff his cap to the paediatrician in England who referred to an 11-year-old boy who was suffering from appendicitis a "wimp".
Liam Stone was taken to hospital by his mum for three days running with acute stomach pains, but each time he was sent home with painkillers because the doctor did not spot the potentially fatal condition. Liam's mum says: "A paediatrician felt his stomach and asked me is he always a wimp?,Frankly, this brought back terrible memories for this column when we went to the doctor after skinning our knee and were told to stop crying by the doc. That was last Tuesday and I'm still scarred from the experience.
There are many, many reasons to hate vegetarians and most of them are irrational.
But militant vegetarian Mark McGowan certainly provides a good reason to loathe these people after he ate a corgi live on air.
The corgi had died at a breeding farm and McGowan had it minced with apple and sage and ate it on a radio programme to protest about Prince Charles allegedly torturing a fox.
This is, quite frankly, a disgusting, sickening practice and must be condemned with full ferocity.
Every sane person knows that apple does not go with sage.
The sick bastard.
- IAN O'DOHERTY
