Big Brother, why bother?
last week's Big Brother left me worrying about the sanity of the voting British public.
Their gross misjudgement played an enormous part in Gerry -- the most intelligent and entertaining housemate -- being shown the front door. As Davina put it, Gerry was "betrayed by the size of his brain".
There were no nominations this week. Ziggy, Tracey, Sam and Amanda (Samanda) were exempt from the public vote after earning guru status as part of the Self-Improvement Task -- leaving six housemates -- Brian, Liam, Carole, Kara Louise, Gerry and Jonty to face the public's wrath. As mentally defunct as Tracey is, a rare light bulb clearly went on in her head after she correctly suspected BB's twist.
On Friday night, during the live eviction, the 'gurus' had to choose between Controlling Carole and Gregarious Gerry, the two housemates who received the highest percentage of the public vote respectively. Gallant Gerry pleaded with Ziggy, Tracey and 'Samanda' to nominate him. Despite the fact that they would switch off when he spoke about artifacts and Greek history, unfortunately on this occasion they listened to him. When they chose him for eviction, the gay gallery researcher said: "I'm perfectly fine. I want Carole to win this award . . . I'm proving that I didn't come here for the money".
It's such a pity Gerry made it so easy for the gurus. Had he not intervened, the twins would have ultimately sided with him, Tracey with Carole, which would have left the leathery-faced, small-mouthed former boybander --Ziggy -- to cast the deciding vote.
While I completely understand people voting for Carole, I can't fathom how Kara 'dull-as-a-Sunday-sermon' Louise evaded the chop.
I really didn't think it was possible to be irritated by anyone more than Charmless Charley, but Carole has managed to succeed wonderfully in that regard. Between constantly walking around with a face like a smacked arse and castigating anyone who dares to cook or clean, Carole is a serious pain in the swiss and about as entertaining as doing your tax returns.
Big Brother is not about cooking, cleaning and complaining -- it's about entertaining the TV licence paying public and for all of these reasons and so many more Carole deserved to get the boot on Friday but instead we lost Jezebel.
Yes, he possessed an inverted snobbery, but Gerry had always something to say for himself. He treated us to some great memories -- some moments of lyrical genius, camp over-dramatics and emotion-filled sombre soliloquies. The only plus-side for Gerry now is that he can finally get some action because the rampant sex fiend has been finding it very difficult to squash his ubiquitous sexual frustrations.
Big Brother resembled I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here with the food-related torture last week. They were reduced to basic rations after failing the previous week's Time Machine Task. After passing the week's challenge, it looked like sustenance was in sight -- but Carole went and spoiled it all by producing a stash of confiscated biscuits from under her bed (greedy cow) -- so the entire house was duly punished and has to live on a budget of £70 for the coming week.
It was a clever ploy on the part of the show's producers as the lack of food provided the root of some fierce fracas among the housemates.
