Thursday 18 December 2014

Irish Mammy: What would I like for Mother’s Day?

For That Boy to do a small bit of study over the weekend...

It was the youngest who answered when they rang.

“The Independent want you to do an online blog.”

“Blog?! About what?”

“They want you to talk about what you want for Mother’s Day.“

I was about to say that what I wanted was to not have to do any online blog but I said nothing. The Indo might be a handy crowd to know.

But then I was worried about Online and the comments they’d be writing. They’d tear into you at the drop of a hat. I was reading this thing about Whatshisname, the fella that does that show.  What’s it called? The reality thing where they have to try and  – ah .. I’ll think of it again

Anyway, someone had written below the article: “sick of this talentless nobody. ENOUGH ALREADY”

I asked the youngest why they’d be so angry about everything. “

“Haters gonna hate” says she. I don’t know WHERE she gets the lingo from.

And the other thing Online, you have all this identity theft and these hackers. They’d be going on about it on the radio. It happened to poor Josie Scannell. 

They rang her up out of the blue. Don’t ask me who They were. Some crowd of flybynights.

“Your laptop is infected. We need to kill the virus” they said.

Of course poor Josie is in her eighties and doesn’t know a bit about hackers or viruses or anything and she was all set to tell them every bank card number she had when her eldest came in. Donal is his name. He works for that Pharmaceutical Crowd. Ah you DO know him! Anyway Donal comes in and says to Josie, “Mammy give me the phone”.

I’d say they’d never been called hoors before.

And now of course Josie is the expert on identity theft. “You’d want to watch yourself missus” she says to me.

“Tis all hacklers”. ‘Hacklers’ she calls them. She’s gas.

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