Gone, but not forgotten -- the original Mr Nasty
Celebrated fashion critic Mr Blackwell has passed away at the age of 86 but there is no shortage of famous figures wanting to step into his shoes, writes Declan Cashin
In 2006 - 1st (tie). Britney Spears and Paris Hilton. "Two peas in an overexposed pod! Ladies and gentlemen, the 'SCREAMGIRLS' have arrived!" Getty Images
More photos:Wednesday October 22 2008
The death of fashion critic Mr Blackwell at the age of 86 has robbed showbiz of one of its wittiest and most entertaining meanies.
Blackwell's annual best and worst dressed lists, which he started compiling in 1960, struck fear into the hearts of every starlet in Hollywood, and few celebrities were spared his savage zingers over the past four decades.
Amongst his most memorable bon mots include referring to Barbra Streisand as "a masculine Bride of Frankenstein", dismissing acting legend Meryl Streep for "looking like a gypsy abandoned by a caravan", and comparing royal consort Camilla Parker-Bowles to "a petrified parakeet from the Jurassic age".
Even self-styled fashion icon Victoria Beckham wasn't immune to Blackwell's vicious pen, coming out as his worst dressed celeb last year, concluding that "in one skinny-mini monstrosity after another, pouty Posh Beckham can really wreck-em".
Blackwell was undoubtedly the original 'Mr Nasty', thriving on his reputation for being a cut-to-the-bone critic, establishing a cruel, waspish template for generations of showbiz meanies to emulate.
Luckily for us, there are quite a few public figures who have been only too happy to pick up Blackwell's caustic mantle, a trend that was facilitated in no small measure by the rise of personality-driven reality television.
Here are just some of the most notable TV meanies to follow Blackwell's shining example:
Sneering music producer Cowell has perfected -- and commodified -- his image as reality TV's Mr Nasty on American Idol, The X Factor and Britain's Got Talent.
At first, Cowell shocked TV viewers with his cruel, mostly honest, putdowns and criticisms, but in recent years he has lost most of his edge, becoming such a parody of himself that he literally parodied himself on both The Simpsons and in the Scary Movie franchise.
Be that as it may, he remains a hugely entertaining figure, as his constant barbs against his friend and fellow X Factor judge Louis Walsh firmly attest.
Sample wit: [to a boyband auditioning for X Factor] "I think you're probably the most disillusioned group of people we've had in this competition. And that's the truth.
"I think the group is horrendous, you have absolutely zero edge, no originality, I think individually you're weak, I think as a group you're even worse. Absolutely zero chance of you guys ever, ever, ever having a successful career."
Like Cowell, the former Watchdog host made her reputation, and fortune, with her caustic treatment and blunt dismissal of contestants on her popular teatime quiz show The Weakest Link.
She replicated her icy, dominatrix persona to great success on the subsequent US version of the show, but has since shown too much of her softer, human side through her frank depictions of alcoholism and parenting in her autobiography and on Oprah Winfrey's show to make anyone believe that her heartless persona is for real.
Sample wit: [on Welsh people] "What are they for? I never did like them."
Sunday Independent journalist O'Connor became Ireland's own Mr Nasty when he took over as a judge on the talent show You're A Star, and quickly mastered his own critical style based "on what viewers at home are thinking".
Deluded wannabes, and even the half decent ones, not to mention fellow judges Linda Martin and Michelle Heaton, all felt his wrath.
However, O'Connor's routine soon grew old, because insulting You're A Star contestants is too much like shooting fish in a barrel.
Sample wit: Referring to the Green Party's Dan Boyle as "the fat one" on Charity You're a Star.
The 70-something comedienne has never been afraid to skewer her fellow celebrities, and nowhere does she shine more than on the red carpet outside various award shows.
With her daughter Melissa, she comperes for the E! entertainment channel, and numerous star attendees purposefully try to avoid her microphone for fear of receiving a literal dressing down.
Such is her level of goading that nice-guy Oscar host Billy Crystal singled her out in his opening monologue for "looking like a hooker with a microphone", provoking a huge cheer from the Rivers-chastened audience.
Sample wit: [speaking at this year's Emmy awards] "Julia Louis Dreyfuss: what was she thinking with that severe comb-over? Luckily she waxed her moustache because otherwise she would look like Hitler."
The cattiest judge on the BBC's hit reality show Strictly Come Dancing, Revel Horwood often incurs boos and cat-calls from the studio audience for his acid-tongued appraisal of the celeb contestants hoofing on the dancefloor. Like any TV meanie worth their salt, Revel Horwood recently admitted that members of the public abuse him on the streets, and one woman has even slapped him in the face.
Sample wit: [to SCD contestant Gary Rhodes] "Your hunched back and lurching neck are really hindering your progress."
Trinny and Susannah:
Fashion police Trinny Woodall and Susannah Constantine became stars for their no-holds-barred treatment of makeover subjects in their TV shows, What Not To Wear and the Undress series, reducing some women to tears with their harsh remarks and body assessments, prompting one-time special guest Jeremy Clarkson to remark that, "I'd rather eat my own hair than go shopping with those two again".
Sample wit: [Trinny] "Look at her breasts. They're like torpedoes. I thought it was someone's head."
[Susannah] "She shouldn't be wearing vest tops with those upper arms."
Brooker is British journalism's most acerbic, devastating television critic, laying into his subjects in his popular Screenburn column and on his TV show, Screenwipe.
He landed in deep trouble in October 2004 when he implied in one review that George W Bush should be assassinated -- incurring furious feedback from American readers, and even drawing the attention of the US Secret Service, hence creating visa problems for himself for life.
Sample wit: [writing about the vanity of notorious Big Brother 9 contestant Charley Uchea] "Stand Charley in front of a weeping widow at a funeral, and she'd command her to keep still while she checked her reflection in the teardrops."
