– Published 23 February 2014 02:30 AM
A message from the ordinary men of Ireland. Thanks to modern capitalism, we are no longer able to pay the bills – even though the missus works full time. There is only one obvious solution to this. More wives. We are, therefore, converting to Islam, where they have a more liberal view on this sort of thing. If you know of a branch of Islam that turns a blind eye to a fella having a few pints, we'd love to hear from you.