Monday 25 September 2017

The golden child: an expert's view

Phyllis Coulter, psychotherapist

* It's not uncommon to have a favourite child. It's usually because parents recognise something about themselves in the child or characteristics that they are lacking but would like.

* The dangers of being a favourite child are that there is an expectation that comes with it. The favoured child may feel it's necessary to achieve impossibly high standards.

* We form ideas about ourselves in childhood. If it becomes obvious that someone in the family is given more attention and more love, it can have quite profound affects on our core belief in ourselves.

* As a parent, acknowledge to yourself that you have a favourite. Then consciously accept each of your children for who they are.

Irish Independent

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