‘It's not something that you get over’ - Lily Allen opens up about devastating loss after suffering miscarriage
Lily Allen has spoken for the first time about losing her first child with husband Sam Cooper when she was six months pregnant.
The singer, 28, said she was left “numb” following the miscarriage in November 2010 and that she nearly died having contracting septicaemia in complications afterwards.
Speaking to The Sun on Sunday, Allen said: "It was horrendous and something I would not wish on my worst enemy. It's something that I still haven't dealt with ... But it's not something that you get over.
"I held my child and it was really horrific and painful - one of the hardest things that can happen to a person ... I nearly died. But I was numb and I didn't care. I'd just lost my baby and that is a reflection of how numb I was.”
The couple have since had two daughters, Ethel, two, and 15-month-old Marnie, and Allen said that her son will always be part of the family: "I just think that he's a part of my eldest really. If he hadn't died, it wouldn't have physically been possible for our eldest to be alive because I got pregnant with her so quickly.
"We've got a little stone in our garden with his name on. And lots of different things that I do, rituals, I have him in my mind."
Allen also thanked her husband for helping her to get through the devastating experience and for stopping her from “self-medicating with alcohol and whatever else” when they first started dating in 2009.
The singer, who recently returned to the music industry after a four year hiatus, has chosen to speak publicly about her grief for the first time in the hope that it will help others going through miscarriage.
Allen had previously suffered a miscarriage with previous partner Ed Simmons of the Chemical Brothers in 2008.