Angela Scanlon: the dating game
Have we swiped out romance in favour of casual flings?
Published 12/07/2015 | 02:30
There's an auld sock for every shoe" my mother's friend once told me while I was in a heartbroken state at a family wedding. It made me cry but was also weirdly comforting, if a little underwhelming. Not quite the Hollywood romance I was hoping for but maybe it was just delivered with a stroke of realism.
Download Tinder or Plenty of Fish, and you can open up a whole world of digitally savvy, deliciously available men. Potential flings or life-long partners. A date a day, one a week or just for special occasions. You can get any-thing you want assuming someone else wants the same thing too. Fleeting embraces or forever in love.
My friend's three-year-old daughter recently saw a man on a train, head in phone. She was fascinated with his actions, his swiping, and asked if she could 'play the game'. Obviously Tinder is not for three-year olds nor is it a game - although the gimmicky swipe motion that made it so catchy has kind of added to the sense that the faces you dismiss in a millisecond are not really attached to living breathing people.
A single and fabulous pal who is one of my dearest and most eligible acquaintances, had dismissed this online dating game entirely. After a string of coffee shop horrors with all sorts of tight-fisted, sandwich-splitting creeps she declared herself 'out'. (No, she's not a lesbian, she's just checked out for a bit.) Some of the men she met were brutally honest about what they're looking for - and if sex after a latte wasn't on the cards, then what was the point? Of course it's often offered up as a joke, a bit of 'banter' but actually the expectation weighs heavy and she's not into it, and therefore so over it.
This is a shame, she's one of the good ones and she really would like to find a half decent one for herself. She's a social being, she's out and about, and doing normal human things - it's just most people are using going out to catch up with their mates rather than seek out a perspective actual mate.
Like everything else, love has moved online, so instead of resisting, why not jump on board? There is something beautifully vulnerable and transparent about 'putting yourself out there' in a really honest way. Admitting that yes you would like to meet someone serious, not wanting to play games and mess around. Using 200 characters to reveal yourself and hope someone 'picks' you. I admire those who bear their souls and admit they're after the fairytale…
Get a booty like KT
Kathryn Thomas has an arse most of us would dream of. She's Ireland's answer to Kim Kardashian, except she's got a lot of jobs and has never oiled herself up for a magazine cover. So far! Not only is she one of the busiest telly hosts in the country, she's also launched Pure Results Bootcamp to whip the nation into shape. It's now decamping to The Kingdom - Sheen Falls Country Club, Kenmare to be exact - throughout July and August. See pureresultsbootcamp.com
Life's a picnic
I love a good picnic. A posh one, not soggy old sandwiches in clingfilm. It's easy eating al fresco once it's not lashing rain so leg it to the Phoenix Park or the closest field for a little blanket action. Pack a whopping loaf, some salads and a few cans. It's a dreamy way to spend a low-key evening…