A heartbreaking last letter by Lucy Stack assured her friends that "no call could have changed this, no chats over wine."
Around 1,000 mourners attended the deeply private funeral service today for Ms Stack (28) who, with her husband, trainer Fozzy Stack had been "Racing's Golden Couple" they heard.
"I need you to know that what has happened is no reflection of how you were as my friend," she wrote in the sad letter.
"No call could have changed this. No chats over wine."
"Sadly, this is just my fate. I know it is selfish and cowardly but for me it is my only option. I can't face this world any longer. I'm just not strong enough. Too much has happened," she wrote.
Lucy's devastating words were today read aloud by her grieving husband, Fozzy at her deeply private funeral service at the tiny St Ultan's church in Rathcore, Enfield, Co Meath.
The letter, signed "Friends forever, Lucy," caused many mourners to break down in tears.
It emerged that Lucy had planned her funeral mass down to each hymn and reading.
In the letter, she thanked her friends for "fun times, for the laughing, dancing and giggles."
She urged them to remember the happy days they'd had together, saying: "Please let my memory be one of happiness and laughter. Do not remember me for the sadness and the way things ended."
Her father-in-law Tommy Stack told mourners that Lucy had suffered silently from a young age" but said she was now at peace with her deceased father, David Foster, who died at the age of 43 after a fall from a horse.
Anyone who is affected by issues in this article can contact Samaritans Ireland on Lo-call 1850 60 90 90.