Such is the wonder of 21st-century living that we can address our problems in a mere flash. Feeling a bit wobbly in the thigh area? We hire a personal trainer. Feet feeling the pinch from killer heels? We right that wrong with a pedicure or a trip to the chiropodist.

Yet it's no small irony that the one thing that holds us together -- our mental well-being -- ends up a little farther down the pecking order. Seen as something that the clinically depressed and the self-absorbed did, therapy in Ireland has long been considered as less a necessity and more a pricey luxury.

But now a growing number of people are incorporating their head's happiness into their basic maintenance package. What's more, they're finding that a few hours of therapy a month helps many other things fall into place.

Sophie (not her real name), a 27-year-old PA from Dublin, is one such girl who now visits a counsellor every few months for what she describes as a "top-up session".

Relief

"I had various issues in my life which I felt were still impacting on me, including parental bereavement and an abusive relationship in my late teens," she says.

"I sometimes found coping with day to day life difficult. I knew some people who had gone to counselling, and I suppose I just went when I felt I had de-railed and couldn't cope," she adds.

Once she realised that she needed to speak with a professional, she took the first big step of finding the right counsellor.

"I actually went through a few counsellors, staying with each for a few sessions. I think it can take a while to find the right fit," she recalls. "My first session was just a huge relief, I talked non-stop; it was a torrent of words. The counsellor was very calming and just let me speak.

"At the end we discussed how we might move forward, I agreed to go for six sessions and then we would re-evaluate. She also asked me if there were any particular issues I would like to work on or address in future sessions. I felt like a huge weight had been lifted when I came out."

According to Shane Kelly, professional services manager at the Irish Association for Counsellors and Psychotherapists (www.iacp.ie), it's hard to determine how many Irish people are getting counselling because of confidentiality issues.

But he is certain that many people are seeking a professional ear to bend and not just because their grace period with their friends is coming to an end.

"There's a massive feeling of openness about counselling now, and it's not seen as a sign of weakness," he observes. "Matters have been helped greatly by TV shows like In Treatment. Some people go to deal with bereavement; others deal with ongoing anxiety or to clear up something deep in the past. Depression is just one of the reasons why people might go.

"There's a new generation of therapy clients who think to themselves 'if you want to get fit, you go to the gym; if you want to work something out in your head, you hire a professional'."

Just as there are thousands of reasons for seeking out a therapist, so too are there countless types of therapy (around 400 at last count).

"Primarily, therapy is about being listened to in a non-judgmental environment," explains Shane. "By and large, non-directive therapists listen to what you are saying, while directive therapists tend to suggest to their clients to do this and try that."

Solutions

Sophie's therapist was in the former camp. "During each session I spoke about whatever issues I felt I needed to discuss," she notes. "It is not the counsellor's job to provide solutions, rather they facilitate you (by providing a safe place for you to talk) so that you can work through your problems and come to your own conclusions.

"Occasionally she might comment or ask questions that can lead you to see things in a different light or come to certain realisations. A counsellor essentially holds up a mirror."

Among the two most commonplace are cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) and psychoanalysis.

"CBT helps us to try and change negative thoughts that have an impact on our actions," reveals Shane. "People are so worried that things will go wrong that they become physically anxious the whole time. CBT helps us to re-programme the way we think of things. You learn how to identify when you're thinking negatively, and how to dilute those thoughts.

"Psychoanalysis tackles your experiences of growing up to see if they've had an impact on your behaviour," he adds. "You think back on your relationships with parents and friends to see how they've shaped you. Once you know why you are the way you are, you can then control your actions more."

After six sessions, Sophie admits she was ready to face the world again.

"I had worked through various issues and given myself space to contemplate or grieve so I wasn't immobilised by them any more," she admits. "I was not 'fixed', I don't think anyone ever is, but I was in a place where I could deal with what life threw at me on a daily basis. I feel like I'm in a better place now and not hindered by past events."

Nowadays, Sophie occasionally visits her therapist when she feels an emotional 'wobble' on the horizon and has found that many of her friends are doing exactly the same.

"I think many people go through life on autopilot, never dealing with issues that can, unbeknownst to them, be having a huge effect," she asserts. "I went for a few sessions after I had finished the original six sessions and I found that really helpful. I would go back again if I felt I needed it.

Help

"Life itself is enough of a reason, everyone has problems and we all need help getting through from time to time. Sometimes advice from friends and family just doesn't do it and you need the help of an objective professional."

After a long-term relationship broke down, 31-year-old Catriona (not her real name), from Kildare, also decided to seek professional help.

"It's not the easiest thing in the world to do, admitting to yourself that you have a problem, but I had to give myself kudos for realising that sometimes we need someone who is just for us, to re-balance us and help us get our strength back," she admits.

"My counsellor was very specifically a listening counsellor and didn't interact much -- it's very much a case of being at a point where you can talk and talk and talk," she adds.

"This leads to you figuring out stuff in your head. I don't know how exactly that works but it did. What the counsellor did say was brief and to the point, but I felt she was still kind and caring.

"What I found was that you do need to work through ideas and thoughts and fears and start blasting all those nasty under-the-bed-at-night parts of us we don't always want or allow ourselves to acknowledge during the day," she continues. "Just starting the ball rolling is the hardest bit."

Yet for every person who has had a functional rapport with their therapist, there are many others who have yet to find the right fit. In this situation, it's entirely appropriate to call time on the relationship.

"If it's not working, I cannot stress enough that you should go to a different one," advises Shane.

"Call them up and ask as many questions as you like before you go. It won't cost you anything and you'll get a feel of whether you and the counsellor will be a good fit. If you can get a recommendation, all the better."

Of course, in these recession-addled times, the cost of counselling is prohibitive. Because of the expense of therapy -- at roughly €50-€70 an hour -- many see their head health as something they will address when their financial circumstances change. However, low cost or free therapy is widely available across the country.

"Some centres in Dublin, for example, have a donation box where you donate anonymously," explains Shane. "Other therapists offer a sliding scale to clients based on their financial circumstances."

Either way, those who have taken the plunge have found the peace of mind they receive after the therapy experience to be utterly priceless.

"I was worried about cost but at the time I was so desperate for help it was not a big issue," admits Sophie.

"Also, when we consider what we spend on socialising and so on, paying €50 a week for a service that can be of such benefit to your quality of life isn't that much."

Help is at hand: How to find a counsellor

For information on low or no-cost counselling, be sure to check out the following helpful websites:

• www.reducedcostcounselling.com

• www.lowcostcounselling.org

• www.holisto.com.

To find a counsellor log on to:

• www.iacp.com

- Tanya Sweeney

Irish Independent