Thursday 19 October 2017

The soapbox

Sheena McGinley

UNREQUITED LOVE AND THE ODD CARJACKING

Fair City So, Orla really does fancy Wayne – so much that she's particularly distraught when he asks her to leave his job open for two months so he can hightail it around South America with Maeve.

Continuing with soapland's preoccupation with female's punching below their weight, Vivienne lets Paddy cosy up to her the best he can this week. She lets him whisper all sorts in her ear, including a harrowing account of the abuse that led him to murder.

On the upside, Cardle is point blank refusing to have anything more to do with Fardell.

Coronation Street Ryan's lost interest in spectacular style, so expect to see Chesney and Katy back together imminently. Another couple in the offing – based on the fact that they've started talking to each other – is Sally and Tim.

The latter confides in 'Corrie's' most attractive divorcee of a certain vintage (someone had to say it, Gail) that he's leaving the street because it's best for Faye, which invariably means he won't be leaving the street at all. Peter starts dealing in risky business, and a comment made by Paul leaves Lloyd horrified.

emmerdale Rhona must be getting 'mardy face' coaching off real-life lover Cain – it's true, they're married; Debbie Dingle and David Metcalfe are also engaged – because her latest batch of internet-sourced pills get intercepted.

She then puts Laurel and Leo in mortal danger by making them drive around undesirable neighbourhoods in a quest to find 'teething gel'.

Val and Pollard try to get Bernice and Steve to invest in the B&B, while Cameron promises Debbie he'll back off, breaking her heart even further.

EastEnders Kat and Bianca spend most of this week shaaaatin' at each uvvah. We could go into why, but that would ruin the surprise (Bianca's erratic actions this week put Jean in danger, or summink).

Dexter gives Ava an ultimatum that leaves her with an extremely difficult discussion to make. You'll never guess what that is. Alice lays down the law with Joey when Michael moves back in; Ian asks Lucy for help, and Liam does the inevitable runner before his court hearing.

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