Game of Thrones season 7 episode 1 review: Feminist Jon Snow, Ed Sheeran, hipster Euron and top knot jokes
A solid, if predictable, return
I don't know if a Maester invented a time travel machine in between Game of Thrones seasons 6 and 7, but there sure was a lot of 2017 influence going on in last night's return episode, 'Dragonstone'.
*Episode 1 spoilers ahead*
It saw The Hound making fun of Thoros of Myr's top knot (Clegane literally calling it a "top knot", presumably having learned the term from a Westeros blog), Euron Greyjoy debut a new look that was less winter is here than 'autumn/winter is here', Ed Sheeran parachuted in for a jarring cameo and King Jon Snow/Stark/Targaryen making a big leap for gender equality in the Seven Kingdoms.
Read more: Ed Sheeran sings in Game Of Thrones cameo
Episode 1 kicked off with a rare cold open, a little coda to the end of season 6 in which we saw Arya impersonate Walder Frey using her half-completed Faceless Man training and poison a substantial amount of the Frey army. It was a fun little scene, but now presents the possibility of us having to question whether every single character from here on out is just Arya in disguise.
After the opening titles, winter billowed toward us, the Night King, legions of wights and even a few wight giants marching South. Bran was privy to this through his visions, and he and Meera finally made it to The Wall, setting about getting the word out about the Night King and probably dearly wishing Westeros had WhatsApp.
Meanwhile in Winterfell, Jon declared that women would be needed in the fight against the White Walkers, earning him a nod of approval from Brienne and the backing of Lyanna Mormont. There was immediate disagreement between him and Sansa, who even hinted at having sympathy with the malevolent Cersei. You can tell Sansa is going to cause major problems this season but, interestingly, not by serving as a puppet for Littlefinger - whom she schooled in the episode - but by being ruthless and prideful in her own right.
Over in King's Landing, newly-crowned Queen Cersei resumed necking wine at an admirable rate and started plotting military strategy. Emphasising Tyrion's allegiance to Daenerys to Jaime, the latter was put in a very awkward situation and you can already see a decision on the horizon in which he has to choose between his sister and his brother.
Later, Euron Greyjoy arrived at the seat of power, mischievously flirting with Cersei and mocking Jaime while pushing for an alliance with the Lannisters against Daenerys. Cersei and Jaime weren't persuaded, but Euron promised to bring them a "precious gift" which could sway things (this could very likely be the Dragonbinder from the books, a horn Euron owns which can be used to control dragons - eeeek).
Next in the sub-plot cycle was Sam Tarly, who got stuck into a Harry Potter-esque storyline in the Citadel which saw him sneaking into its vast library at night to break into the restricted section. Here he learned that Dragonstone is home to a mountain of dragonglass - surely a huge revelation for no. 1 dragonglass fan, Jon.
Quick run-through of the other elements: Jim Broadbent arrived as a Maester and mentor to Sam with a fairly short shrift when it comes to Sam's White Walker obsession, Brienne trained Podrick and continued to get eyed up by Tormund, Ser Jorah was seen succumbing to greyscale in a Citadel cell and Ed Sheeran popped up for an incredibly unsubtle cameo (I'm trying to block it out my mind but you can read more on it here).
One of Game of Thrones' weakness has long been how quickly it must rattle through plot points, and there was a prime example near the end tonight in which The Hound ridiculed the Brotherhood without Banners over their faith, only to briefly see a vision in a fireplace moments later and swiftly do a 180. There were also some predictability issues with the episode - I definitely had a "She's going to say 'Shall we begin?' isn't she?" moment seconds before Daenerys did indeed close the episode with the words "Shall we begin?"
It was a thrill to have the show back and it looked more stunning than ever thanks to its upped per-episode budget. 'Dragonstone' felt a little like it was going through the motions at times though, and I hope the show - as it continues to outstrip the books - can still shock us as we lurch toward this finale fight in the North.
Independent News Service