Five big reveals from Sharknado 3
Published 24/07/2015 | 14:43
Sharks! Jedwards! Lots (and lots) of vaguely famous people having their heads chewed off. Sharknado 3 aired on SyFy last night and very nearly blew up the internet in the process. Here are the five big reveals from the schlock masterpiece.
1. Famous People Will Appear In Anything
What unites Ne-Yo, Jack Collins, ex-Incredible Hulk Lou Ferrigno and Game of Thrones author George RR Martin? They all have cameos in Sharknado 3. We're guessing Mr T and David Hasselhoff were busy that weekend. Scratch that – Hasselhoff was in Sharknado 3 as well.
2. B-Movie Special Effects Are Getting Better
Clearly Sharknado is lowest denominator entertainment, not to be taken seriously. But the CGI is a distinct step up for SyFy/The Asylum (producers of the movie). It was almost as if they wanted to make a professional-looking film that didn't cause your eyeballs to ache.
3. Jedward Are Back
A shark-based weather system represents different things to different people. To some, it's a sign that the modern b-movie has very literally jumped the shark.
To others it may be evidence that, had she gone about things a little differently, Tara Reid could plausibly have had a mainstream movie career. For John and Edward Grimes, a cameo in the year's best worst film was nothing less than a shot at career redemption.
They were chased down the Thames by flying sharks to promote the flick and have released a tie-in single, Oh Hell No – and the world media loves them for it. They're back – all thanks to an infestation of airborne marine-predators.
4 Sharks In Space Are Now A Thing
How could The Asylum trump the scenery-devouring silliness of Sharknado 2? By sending sharks into space, of course. It turns out ravenous great whites are just as dangerous in near earth orbit as when sneaking up behind you at sea.
5 It Is Possible to Survive Being Eaten Alive By A Shark and Then Re-Entering The Earth's Atmosphere
…At least if you're a character played by Tara Reid. In the climactic final third of the movie a pregnant Reid is swallowed whole by a shark, tumbles back to earth and, on splashdown, is revealed to have given birth. Do heart-warming endings come any fuzzier? They do not.