DRAG Queen Shirley Temple Bar says she never regrets spending money.
"I do, however, regret spending my time poorly. I'll never, for instance, get back the 74 minutes I unwisely spent listening to Cheryl Cole's new album," she says.
" Anne Doyle advised me to get a pension when I started in RTE, because 'you never know how short your career might be'. I think she was being nice. Either way, she was right. That pension has been a great source of entertainment for all my friends. Keith Barry couldn't make that money disappear any faster.
"Make-up is my biggest on-going waste of money. Like Bertie Ahern, I don't like to wear too much, but people feel cheated if they come to a show and all I've got is nude lips and clear mascara.
"If I could buy anything no matter what the price, I'd love to live in those red and white chimney stacks at Pigeon House in Dublin Bay. The views would be spectacular and they symbolise Dublin almost as much as I do.
"I have never bought shares. I am clueless about stuff like that (mainly because I have a business degree) . . . I nearly bought some Anglo Irish shares from a woman on Moore Street last week but I wasn't sure they were real.
"If I won €5m on the lottery . . . I'd probably put the whole lot back in to more Lotto tickets. Oh, and I'd buy my Ma a new washing machine. She's had to wash everything by hand since my granny died."